Who Am I

Mis à jour le 19/12/2023

I can't kill myself
I don't know my own self
Who am I?
Everything is a lie..

I just want to run away 
Like what I did yesterday
Taking too much medicine to die
And I can't even do this right!

I know it was the right decision
Yet my mind is hurting my heart and my head
I hate all of my reactions..
Why is it so hard..

I just want you to come back 
You're not like the others 
But I know you'll stay back
As I was mean to you..

I suffered too
When I thought you'll go 
I was becoming a fool
Because of the pain inside me..

I've always failed everything
It's so painful to live with my memories
If I can even't keep a small thing
Why would I succeed with a big one, please..

I know I don’t deserve anything now..

You were my happiness
The one that kept me from drowsiness
I'm still dreaming of the marriage
We wanted to do, despite our age 

Are you still thinking of us
Did you read my last message
Do you think we'll meet again 
What are you doing since then ..

I chose the worst way 
And it’s hurting me
‘Cause I remember the good days
I hate myself so much that I felt on my knees..

I hope you'll come back
Until then I'll try to be better
Even if I know inside it's over 
I just can't admit the word never..

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© Anthony Grenier – 20 Avril 2020